Mindset- Action divorced from outcome.

Lets talk mindset. In today's blog I'm going to argue that the best way to find good physical and mental health and reach your goals is to take action and remain totally divorced from outcome. I'll explain what I mean by that below.

When starting a new endeavor, an exercise program, a new sport, hobby or a job most of us start with a mindset of humility. Surely no one when first dribbling a basketball feels confident they'll be the next Michael Jordan. We typically start something because we think we'd enjoy it, we want to play with friends, we want to learn a skill, build a healthy habit, to be more productive, provide for our family or ourselves, to serve others, etc.

Somewhere along the way we start measuring ourselves against others, comparing our skills or results against those around us. Its a natural inclination. In modern times we extend this to the truly elite, we're a couple clicks away from seeing the best in sport train on youtube or Instagram. I can quickly check what Saquon Barkley's max squat is, how much Tia-Clair-Toomey lifts or runs a mile in, or how much money the best in a given profession is bringing in.

This is when the devil often creeps in, in the form of pride. The ego can start calculating. "I'm this far off from so and so in this regard, maybe i could be the best." "If I only train this many hours for this many months, maybe I could be the fittest." On its face this doesn't sound like a bad thing. It definitely is.

Remember the "why we started" topic? What were the reasons? Humble ones. To become more healthy, to have fun with friends, to learn a skill, because we think we'd enjoy it, to provide for others, to serve others. . None of these are ego driven. None of these are about placing ourselves in a hierarchy over others. The act(present moment-"action") of practicing(a sport, a skill, a task, a job) or learning is present moment. It's being immersed in doing, being, accomplishing the thing. I go on the run because its good for me. I head to work because its important to serve others and to provide for my family.

The ego driven mindset is future tense, "If I do this I can be the best", "I'm working hard so that I can gain respect, fame, and notoriety" "I'm doubling up my hustle so that I can get promoted" Much like a child looking for a gold star. This motivation is unsustainable, counting on things that are totally out of your control. There are external factors that can derail you from achieving your aim here. Genetics, finances, time, luck, workplace politics, nepotism. I could keep going, the list is endless.

There was a very brief time where I thought maybe I could become a CrossFit Regionals(now Semifinals) competitor. This is a feat less than.5% of CrossFit competitors achieve. Truly an accomplishment only attained by the elite. I studied the best of the best as much as I could and doubled up my hustle. I trained once or twice a day, 6 days a week. The more I learned I quickly realized this was an unrealistic goal. No matter how much I trained I wasn't going to deadlift 600lbs, I wasn't going to snatch 315lbs, for those not familiar with the sport I'm saying I wasn't going to make the NBA as a 5'9 slow twitch middle distance runner. I was honest with myself about this and I had competitors state that this was actually a mental defect. "You gotta believe you can do it Jon, cmon" I assure you, no amount of belief will allow me to snatch 315lbs or dunk from the free throw line.

In my time competing in and coaching CrossFit, I've probably met 75-100 people who stated "I'm going to make Regionals" or "I'm going to make the Games" out of that group of lets say 100, two of them accomplished that goal. More importantly almost every single one of them is completely out of the sport now. The vast majority are not fit in any measurable way. Not only did they not reach the goal of being in the top half of a percent in competition, if tested most would fail to be in the top 25%. That is many orders of magnitude lower than the stated goal. As they progressed in their pursuit toward the hierarchical, ego driven goal that depended upon external factors they lost steam, became demoralized and deflated. The goal didn't motivate the same way it used to. I assume this is because they realized it wasn't going to happen for them.

To be clear, I think its great to have massive goals. To be curious as to how far you can make it, to leave room for the possibility of great things happening. There's nothing wrong with that, but the driving force behind your action should be because it is right, because it is good. This is sustainable motivation. When I run the miles because it is good for me, because I enjoy the process I don't get deflated when I get beat in a race. I continue running, I set a good example, I motivate my local community, my family, I maintain my weight and my cardiovascular health.

When one does it for glory, for fame, for attention or notoriety and those things don't come or don't come in the sum or the way that had been desired people tend to become deflated. The foundation for action was external, out of your control, ego driven, shaky and unsustainable. You never had possession of the gold stars and you're crushed that you didn't get one- so you quit. Harsh? If you say so. True? Certainly.

Furthermore the reality of life is that only one person can be the best at any given pursuit. What in the hell are the rest of us supposed to do? Should we all quit squatting because Hafthor or whomever squats 1,000lbs and that is completely out of reach for almost everyone?

If I’m not going to be the fittest in the world should I stop exercising and become a couch potato?

If I’m not going to win the promotion over a competing coworker should I stop working? Stop serving the public? Stop providing for myself or my family? You get the point.

Now if you are truly one of those who could ascend to that fraction of a fraction with the talent, work ethic, resilience and luck to be the best or close to it, should your motivations change? Should the elite think differently? No.

Even for the elite, there will be moments in the journey when you are tempted to project into the future, when things get hard and you start to feel sorry for yourself, you start to feel your goal slipping away and you are tempted to quit. I'm arguing that the answer to this is to stay present minded. Focus on the task that you're doing, the rep or task that you are completing and give it your best because that is what is right. Because its good for you, because its a good example to others, because quitting isn't the example you want to set for others. This is controlling what you can control, this is giving your best, and this will lead to the best outcome.